I am aware that I am less than some people prefer me to be,
but most people are unaware that I am so much more than what they see.
— Douglas Pagels

Friday, May 31, 2013

Three Years Ago (Part Two)






































My time in Florida is one of my most treasured memories.
In spite of chronic pain and declining health, I was at peace there.
Even though I was tired...no, more than tired...I was exhausted,
and every day was a constant unpredictable roller coaster,
my heart aches to return to these days...to the way things used to be.
What I would give for another chance at living.

Friday, May 17, 2013

Three Years Ago (Part 1)



Three years ago today, I was training at the Bob Ross Art Workshop in beautiful New Smyrna Beach, Florida. How quickly things change.

I wasn't well...not by any means. I was on a walking cane, in horrible pain, and sick a lot, but fairly functional and not taking a minute for granted. I made every effort to work part time even though I was on a downhill spiral with permanent weakness due to Periodic Paralysis. At that time, I had no medical help...I appeared somewhat healthy with the exception of the cane, and I couldn't get anyone to listen to me or take my history with the condition seriously even though I had a documented diagnosis.

So, I carried on with life as best as I could. I returned to Florida for training so I could improve my craft and increase business. My students were wonderful, and I desperately didn't want to let them down. I was so happy to be doing what I loved, as seen by the cheesy grin on my face there.

I look at these photos now and wonder how on Earth I did it. It seems so long ago, it's hard to believe that I'm the same person and that is me standing there only 36 months ago. It almost doesn't seem real.

But it was real, and I miss it all so very much.