Sunday, January 30, 2011

Baby Update

My sister's baby shower is coming up in February. Her invitations are the best:

How cute is that? I love Dr. Seuss! :) The due date is confirmed for late March so she is expected to arrive the week of my birthday. I can't wait to make the trip to Louisiana for Jo's birth!

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Quick check-in with pics!

Things are getting rolling where school is concerned, but I'm on schedule so I wanted to say hi before things got crazy.

I am honored to be a featured artist at Many Places Gift Gallery in Long Beach, MS! The grand opening was last Saturday, and we had a great time...

The work was beautifully arranged by a genius of a lady who runs the gallery

My specialty soaps! I've already sold a few bars.

Storm's Rolling In - 20 x 16 Oils

Winter Morning - 18 x 24 Oils

One that I wasn't expecting to display, but it was the gallery owner's favorite! My first charcoal pencil still life - 22 x 28 matted and framed (sorry the photo is so crooked...that would be my fault).

Good music...

Love this wall!!!

It is a humbling experience to meet and greet art enthusiasts who are admiring your work. I was quick to tell them that I am the new kid on the block, and if I can do it, they can too!

Back to my to you soon!

Thursday, January 20, 2011

And the academic insanity begins...

Biology and fast track Psychology/Human Growth & Development. Ten hours. WHAT WAS I THINKING.......

Just logging in and looking at the courses, I am completely overwhelmed and hardly know where to begin. My BloggerDash will surely suffer this semester...just a heads up and my time will most likely be limited here. I am almost certain that my 4.0 is toast, or maybe I'll surprise myself and figure this stuff out a little better than I think I will.

But at this point and time, I'm praying just to pass these classes. If I end up with B's or C's, I'll take it and run.

Being sick and in bed most of the time is not helping. I'm weak and exhausted and just wish I could function as normal. I'm having many more bad days than good days, and that is not how I wanted to start 2011. This year must be better than last. It has to be somehow.

I'll write more later. Just really tired right now. Gonna take meds, a hot shower, and then dive into a Psychology marathon.

Monday, January 17, 2011

We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope. -Martin Luther King, Jr.

This week...

Semester #6 of college begins in less than 15 minutes. It's going to be a doozy...Biology, Psychology, and Human Growth & Development. Hoping to keep my GPA in tact but I will honestly be satisfied with a B in Biology as I got B's and C's in junior high and high school. Science, math, and foreign language are my worst subjects. I can have straight A's in everything else (and do, almost), but those subjects get me every time. Oh well...I'll do my best as always, and hopefully hang in there. Thankful that my classes are online...there's no better way for someone like me to complete academics, that's for sure. After this semester, I'll be diving into the maths...Lord help me...and hopefully painting if I have the funds.

Besides school, I have a class to teach on Saturday in Pascagoula, and I am honored to be a featured artist at the grand opening of Many Places Gift Gallery in Long Beach, Mississippi, also on Saturday. I will be leaving my class and going straight there, arriving fashionably late by at least an hour. I have several pieces of art that will be on display, as well as introducing my new specialty soaps!

I've been making soap like a fiend and loving it. I hope folks like them! I'll be working on more types of soap, including goat's milk, all natural lye, and sugar scrub soon! Can't wait! I have to say that my favorites so far are the peppermint and the facial bar. I'm using the facial bar on my hands right now and it has really helped heal my cracked, burning hands from this horrendously cold weather we've been getting on the coast.

I'll take photos at the gallery event if allowed. If you're a local, I'd love to meet you at Many Places Gift Gallery Saturday night!

Talk to you soon,


Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Time, life, and new followings...

I've been wanting to write about 2010, but I can't bring myself to do it yet. I feel the need to wait until I can collect my thoughts...there are so many...and really think it all through. "Through" being the key word, because I desperately want 2011 to be a year of renewed hope and restoration in my body, mind, and spirit.

So for now...I wait. I'm taking time to focus on my body and the constant attention it demands as it fights tooth and nail to break me down, both physically and emotionally. I feel like the clock is ticking...ticking...a sound that I can't escape. Living with a sense of urgency as I've often talked about, but with less "saneness" (a cute word one of my teachers used one day) over the past year than usual. I'm still trying to decide if that's ok...just a part of the process, as if I'm a piece of abstract art that some people "get" and others very much DO NOT GET. At all. I plan to eventually blog this out of my system, and let it go. But for now...I feel the need to heal, in a sense.

I pray that time is the healer that it claims to be.

Before I go, just a few links to blogs that I've added to my Dash over the past week:
EXTREME COUPONING!!! I spent $21 on $50 worth of stuff at Walgreens tonight by using coupons, register rewards, and scoping out sales. The *COUGHfamilydiscountCOUGH* didn't hurt either (thanks Chris)! When I have the funds, my next stop is Super Target, with a stack of coupons in hand.
That's my Coach Scheffy. :) I've been the self-proclaimed cheerleader of his Team Beachbody group for almost 3 years now...hard to believe! I can't do all the stuff that they do, but I cheer them on and they inspire me to keep on keeping on with this battle for my health. I've made wonderful friends through Team Scheffy and I'm so grateful.

Talk to y'all soon...


Saturday, January 8, 2011

We don't have control over who loves us...

...but we do have control over choosing to love ourselves.

Know that you have value, and you were put on this planet for a season and a reason.

Seek. Hope. Believe.

You never know the impact you will make by simply embracing yourself and those around you while you have the chance.

Those words are for someone tonight.

Perhaps you.

Perhaps, only me.

Good night.

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

One year ago today...

I had surgery. Of the female variety. Consider that your TMI warning for this blog entry. Or feel free to go look at my 2009 and 2010 archives if you want the scoop (but you probably don't...just sayin').

It had to be done...I was truly suffering, developed pre-cancer, and had run out of options.

I am grateful that a nearby university hospital took me in as a guinea pig for their interns. They were great and it was the most drama-free surgery I have ever had.

And while the anesthesia spawned a massive further decline in my Hypokalemic Periodic Paralysis, leaving me barely able to walk or sit up for 2/3's of the day, having to drop out of my drawing class, not being able to teach at times, and bouts of random crying and crankiness due to the sudden ending of hormone therapy after 15 years, I do not regret it one iota and would do it again in a heartbeat.

In fact, knowing for years now that I would not be able to safely carry a child or give birth due to my conditions, and the physical suffering that I endured since I was a teen from the psycho-uterus from hell, I wish the surgery had happened long ago. I thankfully have not had any trouble since, and I pray that I never, ever relapse.

Coming to terms with the fact that I won't have children has been hard to describe. I have very good days and not so good days. I am thankful that I don't have children, yet I grieve that I don't have the very same time. I imagine that makes sense only to those who walk the road of poverty and disability as I do. I'm not sure. It's still not easy to wrap my brain around, even though I've faced this reality for a long time now.

What bothers me much more is not that I can't be a bio mom, but that I don't qualify to adopt. Knowing that there are children out there who need a parent, and I can't do a thing about it...that's the hardest part. That's what brings me to tears...the children that are already here. I have been an adoption advocate since childhood, always saying that I would be one of those moms. The odds of this ever happening for me are slim now, but I will continue to be an advocate on behalf of millions of children out there that deserve to be loved and taken care of. If I can't do it, I will support those who can. That's why I follow so many adoption blogs and join in their efforts to bring awareness. I can still be a vessel, albeit, indirectly.

Life goes on. And I count my blessings every day.

Now go hug your babies.